VOWS AND RINGS

1. WRITING YOUR OWN VOWS IS EASY! 

Here is a simple 5 line formula: 

 

Line 1: The opening: What you mean to me.

Line 2: Something about how/when you met or beginning of your relationship

Line 3: An attribute that you love in him/her

Line 4:  Your hopes and dreams for the future.

Line 5:  Your Promise 

SAMPLE:

1.  XXX, you are my one true love, my soul mate, my rock. 

2. The moment that I saw you I knew you were for me.

3. When you smile, it makes my soul happy.

4. I want to spend every minute of my life with you. 

5. I promise to support you in all that you do, for the rest of our lives. 

 If you don’t want to write your own vows, pick (OR MIX/MATCH) from the ones below. 

Vows 1: (as phrases or statement)

I, (name), take you (name), to be my (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part. 

1a: (as question)

Do you, _________, take _________, to be your _________, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; until death do you part?

 

 Vows 2:  

I, (name), take you, (name), to be my [opt: lawfully wedded] (husband/wife), my constant friend, my faithful partner and my love from this day forward. In the presence of God, our family and friends, I offer you my solemn vow to be your faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. I promise to love you unconditionally, to support you in your goals, to honor and respect you, to laugh with you and cry with you, and to cherish you for as long as we both shall live.

2a: Do you  __________ take  __________, to be your lawfully wedded  __________, your constant friend, your faithful partner and your love from this day forward. In the presence of God, the universe, and your family and friends, do you offer your solemn vow to be  __________’s faithful partner in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. Do you promise to love (pronoun) unconditionally, to support (pronoun) in (pronoun) goals, to honor and respect (pronoun) to laugh with (pronoun) and cry with (pronoun) and to cherish (pronoun) for as long as you both shall live?

 

Vows 3  

(Name), I take you to be my lawfully wedded (husband/wife). Before these witnesses (or God or the universe) I vow to love you and care for you as long as we both shall live. I take you with all your faults and your strengths as I offer myself to you with my faults and strengths. I will help you when you need help, and I will turn to you when I need help. I choose you as the person with whom I will spend my life. 

3a. __________do you take  __________ to be your wedded  __________. Before these witnesses (or God or the universe)  do you vow to love  __________ and care for  __________ as long as you both shall live. Do take  __________ with all HER/HIS/THEIR faults and your strengths as you offer yourself to  __________ with your faults and strengths.Will you help  __________ when  __________needs help, and will turn to __________ when your  need help. Do you choose  __________ as the person with whom you will spend your life?

Vows 4

I,___________), take you, ___________, to be my beloved ___________, to have and to hold you, to honor you, to treasure you, to be at your side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times, and in the bad, and to love and cherish you always. I promise you this from my heart, for all the days of my life. 

4a: Do you___________take ___________, to be your beloved ___________, to have and to hold, to honor and to treasure, to be at their side in sorrow and in joy, in the good times, and in the bad, and to love and cherish her always. Do you promise  this from your heart, for all the days of your life?

 

2. RING EXCHANGES

RING EXCHANGE CEREMONY  Pick one or two or mix and match – or make your own!

1. I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness. As I place it on your finger, I commit my heart and soul to you. I ask you to wear this ring as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today, our wedding day.
2. This ring is a token of my love. I marry you with this ring, with all that I have and all that I amResponse (IF YOU WANT):
   I will forever wear this ring as a sign of my commitment and the desire of my heart
3. I give you this ring to wear with love and joy. As a ring has no end, neither shall my love for you. I choose you to be my _________ this day and forevermore.
   
4. This ring I give to you as a token of my love and devotion. I pledge to you all that I am and all that I will ever be as your _________. With this ring, I gladly marry you and join my life to yours.
   
5. I give this ring as my gift to you. Wear it and think of me and know that I love you.
   
6. I give you this ring in God’s name, as a symbol of all that we have promised and all that we shall share.
7. I give you this ring as a visible and constant symbol of my promise to be with you as long as I live.
   
8. I give you this ring as a symbol of my love for you. Let it be a reminder that I am always by your side and that I will always be a faithful partner to you.
   
9. I give you this ring as a symbol of my love, my faith in our strength together, and my covenant to learn and grow with you
   
10. 10.Let this ring be a symbol of my promises to you and a reminder of my devotion to you. I am honored to call you my _________.
    
11. With this ring, I thee wed, and with it, I bestow upon thee all the treasures of my mind , my soul, my heart. 
12. (Name), I give you this ring as a symbol of my love. As it encircles your finger, may it remind you always that you are surrounded by my enduring love.Response: I will wear it gladly. Whenever I look at it, I will remember this joyous day and the vows we’ve made.
    
13. I have for you a golden ring. The most precious metal symbolizes that your love is the most precious element in my life. The ring has no beginning and no ending, which symbolizes that the love between us will never cease. I place it on your finger as a visible sign of the vows which have made us _________ and  _________.
14. Because this ring is perfectly symmetrical, it signifies the perfection of true love. Because this ring has no end or beginning, it signifies the eternity of true love. As I place it on your finger, I give you all that I am and ever hope to be.
15. I give you this ring as a symbol of my love; and with all that I am and all that I have, I honor you, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
    
16. This ring I give you, in token and pledge of our constant faith and abiding love.
    
17. In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, (or Mother Earth, the universe or WHATEVER DEITY OR NATURAL PHENOMENON YOU LIKE ___________) take and wear this ring as sign of my love and faithfulness.
     With this ring, I wed you, and pledge you my love, now and forever.
18. I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness. Receive this ring as a token of wedded love and faith.
    
19. I give you this ring as a sign of my vow, and with all that I am, and all that I have; I honor you in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit (or Mother Earth, the universe or WHATEVER DEITY OR NATURAL PHENOMENON YOU LIKE. Amen.

SPIRITUAL WEDDING READINGS

 

1 FROM “INSTRUCTIONS FOR LIFE IN THE NEW MILLENNIUM”  By His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama 

Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk. 

And that a loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life. 

Be gentle with the earth be gentle with one another. 

When disagreements come remember always to protect the spirit of your union. 

When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. 

Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other 

exceeds your need for each other. So love yourselves, love one another, 

love all that is your life together and all else will follow. 

 

2 “ME AND YOU” 

– A literal translation of a poem from the 13th century Yuan dynasty. 

You and I, our love is strong 

Love is everywhere, burns hot like fire 

From a piece of clay, twirl a figure of you, mould a figure of me 

Then together, broken into pieces, blended with water 

Once more twirl a figure of you, and mould a figure of me 

A part of you is within me, a part of me is within you 

In life we share a quilt, and in death we share a shroud

 

 3 I BOW DEEPLY 

Standing quietly by the fence, 

you smile your wondrous smile, 

I am speechless, 

and my senses are filled 

By the sounds of your beautiful song, 

Beginningless and endless. 

I bow deeply to you. 

– Thich Nhat Hanh 

 

 

4 NAVAJO WEDDING BLESSING 

Now you have lit a fire and that fire should not go out. 

The two of you now have a fire that represents love, 

understanding and a philosophy of life. 

It will give you heat, food, warmth and happiness. 

The new fire represents a new beginning – a new life and a 

new family. The fire should keep burning; you should stay 

together. You have lit the fire for life, until old age separates you. 

 

5 PRIVILEGED LOVERS 

The moon has become a dancer at this festival of love. 

This dance of light, This sacred blessing, 

This divine love, beckons us to a world beyond 

only lovers can see with their eyes of fiery passion. They are the chosen ones who have surrendered. Once they were particles of light now they are the radiant sun. 

They have left behind the world of deceitful games. They are the privileged lovers who create a new world with their eyes of fiery passion. 

-Jalalud’din Rumi, 13th Century revered mystical poet 

 

 

6 BUDDHIST WEDDING PRAYER 

Today we promise to dedicate ourselves completely to each other, with body, speech, and mind. 

In this life, in every situation, in wealth or poverty, in health or sickness, in happiness or difficulty, we will work to help each other perfectly. 

The purpose of our relationship will be to attain Enlightenment by perfecting our kindness and compassion toward all sentient beings. 

Lama Thubten Yeshe 

 

 

7 THE MOST ALIVE MOMENT – Rumi

The most living moment comes when those who love each other meet each other’s eyes and in what flows between them then. To see your face in a crowd of others, or alone on a frightening street, I weep for that. 

Our tears improve the earth. The time you scolded me, your gratitude, your laughing, always your qualities increase the soul. 

Seeing you is a wine that does not muddle or numb. We sit inside the cypress shadow where amazment and clear thought twine its growth into it. 

 

8 A TOUCH OF HEART 

There was a time … a moment I felt all alone but then the sun shined upon me bearing gifts of love, friendship and harmony Everlasting love shared and expressed through you to me. The prayers, the cares, the gestures brought forth to me heal my soul For at times I’d only known to give but failed to accept and receive with grace. I’m not alone now for your warmth overwhelms me your spirit fills my soul, and I am ALIVE with your love.

 

9 TWO SOULS, ONE LIFE 

Before the heavens and the earth, when we were still a part of the Great Spirit, you and I asked for a journey to be remembered for all time. Out of Love our hearts desires answered and we were granted these lives. 

Today we fulfill that destiny and begin the journey of a lifetime. We were once one soul, then we became two and were born into this world. We have lived lives separate. Now let us give thank to the Great Spirit for loving us enough to allow our love for each other to be expressed. yesterday we were two souls, today we are one life. 

 

10  “Love” By Roy Croft

I love you, Not only for what you are,

But for what I am When I am with you.

I love you, Not only for what You have made of yourself,

But for what You are making of me.

I love you For the part of me

That you bring out; I love you

For putting your hand Into my heaped-up heart

And passing over All the foolish, weak things

That you can’t help Dimly seeing there,

And for drawing out Into the light

All the beautiful belongings That no one else had looked Quite far enough to find.

 

11 FROM THE PROPHET, BY KAHLIL GIBRAN 

You shall be together forevermore. You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days. You shall be together even in the silent memory of God. Let there be spaces in your togetherness, and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another, but make not above love; let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.

Fill each other’s cup, but drink not from one cup.

Give one another of your bread, but eat not from the same loaf. 

Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.

Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.

For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.

And stand together, yet not too near together: for the pillars of the Temple stand apart, and the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow. 

 

12 MEDIEVAL WEDDING PRAYER 

Father, who art in heaven above,So holy be thy name. Your kingdom is upon us and only thy Will shall we do Here on the soil you doth provide, as for your angels in heaven. 

We are thankful for our daily bread and spirit and be forgiving of our faults as we find others faultless 

OH Lord turn our eyes from temptations and be our holy protector from evil 

For God yours is the entirety of the world, with all power, 

And all goodness and might is Yours for eternity. 

Amen 

 

13 THE APACHE WEDDING BLESSING 

 

Now you will feel no rain, For each of you will be shelter to the other. 

Now you will feel no cold, For each of you will be warmth to the other. 

Now there is no more loneliness, For each of you will be companion to the other. 

Now you are two bodies, But there is only one life before you. 

Go now to your dwelling place, To enter into the days of your togetherness. 

And may your days be good and long upon the earth. 

 

14 BLESSING FOR A MARRIAGE, BY JAMES DILLET FREEMAN 

May your marriage bring you all the exquisite excitements a marriage should bring, and may life grant you also patience, tolerance, and understanding. May you always need one another – not so much to fill your emptiness as to help you to know your fullness. A mountain needs a valley to be complete; the valley does not make the mountain less, but more; and the valley is more a valley because it has a mountain towering over it. So let it be with you and you. May you need one another, but not out of weakness. May you want one another, but not out of lack. May you entice one another, but not compel one another. May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another. May you succeed in all important ways with one another, and not fail in the little graces. May you look for things to praise, often say, “I love you!” and take no notice of small faults. If you have quarrels that push you apart, may both of you hope to have good sense enough to take the first step back. May you enter into the mystery which is the awareness of one another’s presence – no more physical than spiritual, warm and near when you are side by side, and warm and near when you are in separate rooms or even distant cities. May you have happiness, and may you find it making one another happy. May you have love, and may you find it loving one another! 

 

15 FROM BREAD FOR THE JOURNEY- Henri Nouwen

Many human relationships are like the interlocking fingers of two hands…Human relationships are meant to be like two hands folded together. They can move away from each other while still touching with the fingertips. They can create space between themselves, a little tent, a home, a safe place to be. 

“True relationships among people point to God. They are like prayers in the world. Sometimes the hands that pray are fully touching, sometimes there is distance between them. They always move to and from each other, but they never lose touch. They keep praying to the One who brought them together.” 

 

16 IRISH BLESSINGS 

 

May God be with you and bless you; May you see your children’s children. May you be poor in misfortune, Rich in blessings, May you know nothing but happiness From this day forward. May the road rise to meet you May the wind be always at your back May the warm rays of sun fall upon your home And may the hand of a friend always be near. May green be the grass you walk on, May blue be the skies above you, May pure be the joys that surround you, May true be the hearts that love you. 

 

17 SCOTTISH WEDDING PRAYER 

Lord help us to remember when 

We first met and the strong love that grew between us. 

To work that love into practical things so that nothing can divide us. 

We ask for words both kind and loving and hearts always ready to ask forgiveness as well as to forgive. 

Dear Lord, we put our marriage into your hands 

 

18 THOUGHTS IN A GARDEN- R. GERHARDT 

 

This is a special place, a place where people have brought beautiful living plants, here to establish them, to nurture and care for them, that they may forever surround us with the beauty we now see. And into this place where we stand, you have brought something beautiful — the relationship that is becoming your marriage. Here you are declaring it and pledging it, promising to establish and nurture it. We are aware of the special beauty between the two of you, just as we are aware of the special beauty of this place. We are with you now in this appropriate place to celebrate your relationship as it is and as it is yet to be, and in doing so, we ask only that you remember how your  together will have the same seasons and needs as this garden. There will be growth like spring and loss like fall; there will be giving as the blossoming flower, and rest as the seed beneath the snow. All the seasons will be yours, but remember, too, that gardens are not must happenings. The more wonderful the garden, the more skilled the gardener. 

So you will have to care deeply for the life that is yours together, and nurture it. You will have to appreciate your differences and cultivate them. You will have to take care of yourself, if for no other reason than out of love for the other. And you will need the support of family and friends to reach full growth. As you caringly chose this place to declare your marriage, so remember its lessons for your life together through the seasons that are yours to share. 

And may those seasons bring you and yours joy and happiness. 

 

19 THE COVENANT OF MARRIAGE BY CARL SANDBURG 

Marriage has certain qualities of contract, in which two people take on the housekeeping tasks of living, together, to enhance life’s joy. However, marriage is 

more than a contract. Marriage is a commitment to take that joy deep, deeper than happiness, deep into the discovery of who you most truly are. It is a 

commitment to a spiritual journey, to a life of becoming — in which joy can comprehend despair, running through rivers of pain into joy again. And thus 

marriage is even deeper than commitment. It is a covenant — a covenant that says: I love you. I trust you. I will be here for you when you are hurting, And 

when I am hurting I will not leave. It is a covenant intended not to provide haven from pain or anger and sorrow. Life offers no such haven. Instead, marriage is 

intended to provide a sanctuary safe enough to risk loving, to risk living and sharing from the center of oneself. This is worth everything. 

20 I love you for what you are

I love you for what you are, but I love you yet more for what you are going to be. 

I love you not so much for your realities as for your ideals. 

I pray for your desires that they may be great, rather than for your satisfactions, which may be so hazardously little.

 A satisfied flower is one whose petals are about to fall. 

The most beautiful rose is one hardly more than a bud wherein the pangs and ecstasies of desires are working for larger and finer growth. 

Not always shall you be what you are now.

You are going forward toward something great.

I am on the way with you and therefore I love you. 

 

21 A BLESSING FOR THE JOURNEY (BUDDHIST PRAYER) 

Let us vow to bear witness to the wholeness of life, realizing the completeness of each and every thing. 

Embracing our differences, I shall know myself as you, and you as myself. 

May we serve each other for all our days, here, there, and everywhere. 

Let us vow to open ourselves to the abundance of life. 

Freely giving and receiving, I shall care for you, for the trees and stars, as treasures of my very own. 

May we be grateful for all our days, here, there, and everywhere. 

Let us vow to forgive all hurt, caused by ourselves and others, and to never condone hurtful ways. 

Being responsible for my actions, I shall free myself and you. 

Will you free me, too? 

May we be kind for all our days, here, there, and everywhere. 

Let us vow to remember that all that appears will disappear. 

In the midst of uncertainty, I shall sow love. 

Here! Now! I call to you: Let us together live The Great Peace that we are. 

May we give no fear for all our days, here, there, and everywhere. 

— Sensei Wendy Egyoku Nakao. 

22 Love me

 

Love me because I try to touch life within the framework of uncertainty. 

Love in me the shadows of my indecision as I strive to gain knowledge. 

Love in me the silence of my hurts and the noise of my confusions. 

Love me for the feeling of my heart not the fears of my mind. 

Love me in my search for the truth though I may stumble upon fallacy. 

Love me as I pursue my dreams sometimes retarded by illusions. 

Love me as I grow to know myself even during the times of stagnation. 

Love me because I seek God’s harmony not man’s discord. 

Love me for my body that I wish to share with affection, wrapping you in warmth. Love me because we are different as we are the same. 

Love me that our time together will be spent in growing, kindling the world with understanding. Love me not with expectations but with hope. I will love you the same. 

 

 

23 “You can give without loving, but you can never love without giving. The great acts of love are done by those who are habitually performing small acts of kindness. We pardon to the extent that we love. Love is knowing that even when you are alone, you will never be lonely again. & great happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved. Loved for ourselves. & even loved in spite of ourselves.”

― Victor Hugo,  

24  Bob Marley: He’s not perfect, but if he can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can.

She’s not perfect either, and the two of you may never be perfect together. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break—her heart.

So don’t hurt each other, don’t change each other, don’t analyze, and don’t expect more than each other can give

Smile when your beloved makes you happy, let them know when they make you mad, and miss them when they’re not there.

Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect people don’t exist, but there’s always one person that is perfect for you.

25 Here’s To Right Now by Ms Moem

You’re surrounded by your loved ones
And all are wishing you well,
As you create a brand new chapter
In the story that’s yours to tell.

We talk about the memories
You have yet to make together
And the moments you’ve already shared
To be carried with you forever.

But take the time to live today
As your marriage begins,
Look around and soak it up;
the moment we are in.

 For this is where the magic starts
When you both say your vows.
You pledge to spend your lives as one
Because of the love you feel now.

So yes, here’s to a future
that is bright and warm and clear.
But more than that, here’s to right now
And what it means to be here.

26 “Love” by Roy Croft